Why it’s important to build a strong support network

Building a support network means finding and investing in a group of different people who can offer emotional, social, and practical support during difficult times. This takes the pressure off us relying on “one person” to support us in every area of our lives.

If you rely on your partner to be your: counsellor, coach, best-friend, lover, etc. It can put an immense pressure on them, and create a strain in your relationship. It’s not realistic, nor fair to put that amount of pressure for someone to be. Well… Perfect. Your partner isn’t “god” and can’t be everything to you.

For this reason, it’s important that you build a strong support network outside of your romantic relationship, or one other person that you tend to rely on for lots of things. A strong support network can look like having a few close friends you can reach out to, family members, colleagues, mentors, support groups, and healthcare professionals like a counsellor or psychologist.

Here are some reasons why it’s super important to build and continue investing into a group of people around you:

1) Emotional and practical support

It takes a village to raise a child. Different people specialise and have experiences that align with our own. When we build a strong support network for different areas of our lives, it can help us to feel immensely supported, grounded, and secure enough to navigate and handle any challenges we might face.

Certain people in our lives can offer the empathy and practical support that we need. This works vice versa too — you’ll be able to connect with and support different people around you in various ways and times. You might find that when you’re feeling flustered, down or discouraged — rather than talking with your significant other — having a chat with a couple of close friends is the most beneficial as they can hold space for you without judgement or feeling tempted to “fix” you. Your partner might mean the best — but their personality might not naturally be empathetic, which might make you feel worse.

Another example: say that your mum isn’t the most emotionally supportive person, but she offers excellent practical support when things are really busy, or rough. E.g. Being able, willing and available to help with tasks like running errands, cooking meals, or providing transportation.

When times are really tough, you could catch up with your friends to chat, reach out to your mum for practical support, and come home to your partner for a long cuddle. You get the picture right?

If you’re going through some really heavy difficult things, it’s often the case that our loved ones aren’t equipped with the tools to help you through the trauma. They might be able to hold space for you — but it’s important that you seek out professional help from a registered counsellor, psychologist or therapist. They will be able to support you through your emotions and mental health more effectively as they are trained and experienced in that particular field.

When you reach out to the right people for the right kind of support, it will help you actually feel supported, which can take you a long way.

2) Encouragement and perspective

Your support network can offer motivation and encouragement to help you reach your goals.

If you’re an entrepreneur and you speak with another entrepreneur who is 10 years ahead of you — having a chat with them can be incredibly motivating as you can see the steps they’d taken and the challenges they’d overcome to get to where they are today (which is where you might want to see yourself in the future). If you have a chat about your business goals with a friend or family member who have never started or scaled a business — their response and the nature of your conversation is most likely to be very different.

Different people can also offer different perspectives and ideas to help you problem-solve and make decisions.

If you’re a mum and you speak with other mums who are dealing with the same challenges with sleep, breast-feeding, etc. it can give you perspective to hear how other mums are overcoming and managing those troubles too. If you speak with someone who had never been a parent before, they won’t be able to provide the same insights.

For this reason it’s important to build a support network — including people who are at a similar life stage to you.

3) Improved mental health

Studies have shown that having a support network can improve mental health and reduce the risk of depression and anxiety. And this makes total sense.

When you’ve got strong relationships with the people around you and actually feel supported and loved in the ways that you need — this will help you build your resilience, resourcefulness and improve the quality of your life.

Not only that, when you’re able to support, love and lead people who are going through something you’ve personally overcome, or are still overcoming — this can be incredibly enriching too. It is better to give than to receive. If you’ve been equipped with the wisdom, experiences and tools to navigate certain challenges that someone around you is going through, it can be a breath of fresh air to support them in a time of need.

Building a strong support network outside of your romantic relationship, or one other person that you tend to rely on for lots of things can be tricky. Especially as life gets busy, and we step into new, and unknown seasons and chapters.

By investing in close friendships, family members, mentors, support groups, and healthcare professionals — you’ll be able to give and receive strong support, encouragement and perspective. Building a support network is an incredible form of self-care just as much as it is a form of service too. It is 100% worth the time and investment.